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Saturday, September 27, 2008
{ 12:09 AM on '' }
Hello people
Yeah, my previous post was indeed a bit heavy and solemn, oh well. Life's like this sometimes. Ya know, sometimes I really think I live in a cave. There's so much more to life than just my problems and troubles. Others too have their own fair share, and it's really sad how everyone of us is struggling on one way or another, to prove ourselves, to fight for our future, to force and beat ourselves to strive hard, to suffer silently the pain's that breaking us..... Humans are really so fragile, so emotional creatures.
I'm like a welfare kinda person it seems ha, but to all those struggling and in pain, the world is with you, you're not alone! All this studying big hoohaa now and A levels is so tiring.
WAKE ME UP, im gonna have my A levels in like one months time.
ONE MONTHS TIME!!!!!
SO unbelievable. Unimaginable. Unthinkable.
I really live in the cave.
Oh, you know, sometimes i really do wonder how others cope when they have problems and don't have God to turn to, but to rely on their own strength and might to turn the tide around.. Well, God is with you even if you don't know it. This is so true. God has been so good and so cool to me. Sometimes i feel lost, i feel that He's not there, that I'm talking to air, but no, I know I'm not. Oh, thoguh A levels cannot be removed from my life at this point of time, I have a Hope that I can turn to. Amen.
Ah, i need to think through and sort my thoughts. Being 18 is no joke. It's like a completely new phase of life after A's. Adulthood no? Life is so short. The friends i meet, i don't wanna lose them like that. I've lost so many in my pri and sec sch days.. it's not like we share a very deep brother brother you-die-i-die kinda relationship, but it's just their presence and just each of them that makes it different. oh, see, everyone IS special. (Aaawww....)
I really seriously don't have a proper flow of thought. it's all messed up and all, no order, no main topic or whatever... Oh my Cheryl A levels is just one month away!
I feel so different for this A levels. I feel disgustingly sickly not very nervous about it. What's wrong? Ah, buck up man.
Is it because I don't have a real aim and goal for this A's that's causing me to be like a leaf in the wind? Lol. It scares me how others seem so strong willed and determined to fight on...unlike me.
Ha , I realised how I was such an insecure kid in the past. I always question whether I have grown during this period of my youth (It's gonna end like reall sooon), yeah, and how others think of me.... Problems problems problems... this goes back to my first point of my post. Problems. We don't bear them alone cause 6 over billion other people are also struggling, not matter how big or small the matter their going through now.
I find it so intriging sometimes, like the fact that 6 over billion people are living on this planet earth, but i don't see them, only on television, like shows, news...(okay it sounds off my it's true) And how right now even as Im typing this post now someone might be facing a life and death situation now, someone may be attempting to commit suicide, a toddler may be abused right now, an old man struggling on the hospital bed right at this moment...... I know it sounds really bizarre and warped but don't you ever think about it? It feels quite scary but this thought have come across my mind a few times now and then.... Who are watching over these people?? The whole world every individual one of us??
Look above.
How great You are.
SO guys, when you feel all burdened, tired, weary, pissed off, angry with yourself, irritated by your naggy unreasonable parents, struggling with your inner self, lost in your own world, heart-brokened........ Take a breather. Look out at the creation around you. And yeah, you'll feel at peace and secured.
ooohhhh.... so i have typed quite a post today. Wellos, I need to go off to sleep now, sleot really late last night. So till here. I had an amazing rollercoaster ride this week, how about you?
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
{ 9:51 PM on '' }
hello.
SO let's see what happened this week. Who cares if the prelims are over or not? Time flies and having pure fun is hard. I totally truly sincerely blahblah... had a rough week.
ROUGH.
I feel so.......
Nothing can describe it. Grades, A levels, university, future. I've no idea where I'm heading, I've no idea what i'm doing. I've no idea what next. It's like reality is giving me a tough time. It's having a jolly good time giving me headaches and heartaches, slapping me right smack on the face a thousand times, beating the life out of my soul........Emotions so deep, raw, all starting to surface, and life's not good, at all.
I wanna get it over and done with, though there's really small little things in life that makes me smile and feel a lil good of myself, nothing can compare to the brutality if what reality can bring. Im writing as if I know what I am writing but i think it doesn't even sound sensible.
I think I'm living a nightmare now.
I don't know why the feeling of unfairness keeps dawning upon me... It's so hard to really look myself in the eye and see all that's happening, to see how am I really doing, how am i salvaging what barely is left. Escaping is such an easy way out, like DUH, and i've a tendency to go blank and let the world go round. Sometimes, i think im not Cheryl. Like im somebody else in a horror film. (No idea what this means it just popped out of my mind)
I want to ramble all day long. That's how i release my emotions i guess.. ah, why bother socialising when im already at the end of the cliff? Why still invest on everything else except studying 24/7? Some pple say their screwed, but they aren't. They so aren't. I can't help but ramble. What's wrong with me?
This is harder than I thought. I know this is all serious and like major. My i' think i'll just probably suffocate in all this mess... ah, time flies. All that has happened, marks significance in this time of my life.
Identity crisis.
I NEEEEEDD TO SPRINT NOW.
No, i need to be lifted up, out of all this .
Move.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
{ 2:37 PM on '' }
YO YO YO i'm not in the midst of prelims.
Ya know sometimes I wonder waht have I been doing all my past years.. seriously.. I made some super careless mistakes today aaahhh terrible.. It's weird how Im so not myself during papers, as in i feel different(because im subcousciously stressed and im not sure of my stuff),,, I don't wanna be looked down upon, or be seen as a failure.. Well, this is life and one of my challenges and boy don't know how to feel. Oh well.
But i know I've got hope. And Yeah, God's always there.
GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO LESS THAT TWO MONTHS MORE GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
{ 12:38 AM on '' }
Hello people!
Yeah this weekend has been great! Totally cause studying wasn't involved i guess. Don't follow me but yeah, UBEROCK went along pretty well, and I'm so glad my classmates came! Wahahaha.... it was quite funny, the whole thing haha.. And i was glad that everyone hung out quite well together.. Hmmmm, hopefully to see more coming down ya!!!!! More times at starbucks ya!
I thought it was rather dark and gloomy in the service hall haha but anyway it was a great day.
 UBEROCK
 The people with happy three friends behind
 thank you guys for coming! (:
Haha great Saturday!
And for Sunday, i was at The Human Race supporting my friends. Yippee everyone was great! The fastest guy was like 32 min, like crazy. Oh well overall it was quite fun hanging out and all. And please do NOT walk from city to that parkway fish and co cause it's really HOT. Haha. And I was complaining all da way haha.
Oh well, great weekend, will it be great studying this week too? I really hope so.
I have nth to blog about cause i feel quite tired and bored. Y;know it's so funny how eeryone blogs about the same thing haha and we have to read it over again but with different writing styles and all. Well well, oh but i feel this weekend was great, really.
Haha, and i've been sleeping really late these days, kinda -.-
Oh well, gotta wake up early tmr and complete my work! Oh my. Hahaaaaaa, see ya after prelims!
Great.
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Saturday, September 27, 2008
{ 12:09 AM on '' }
Hello people
Yeah, my previous post was indeed a bit heavy and solemn, oh well. Life's like this sometimes. Ya know, sometimes I really think I live in a cave. There's so much more to life than just my problems and troubles. Others too have their own fair share, and it's really sad how everyone of us is struggling on one way or another, to prove ourselves, to fight for our future, to force and beat ourselves to strive hard, to suffer silently the pain's that breaking us..... Humans are really so fragile, so emotional creatures.
I'm like a welfare kinda person it seems ha, but to all those struggling and in pain, the world is with you, you're not alone! All this studying big hoohaa now and A levels is so tiring.
WAKE ME UP, im gonna have my A levels in like one months time.
ONE MONTHS TIME!!!!!
SO unbelievable. Unimaginable. Unthinkable.
I really live in the cave.
Oh, you know, sometimes i really do wonder how others cope when they have problems and don't have God to turn to, but to rely on their own strength and might to turn the tide around.. Well, God is with you even if you don't know it. This is so true. God has been so good and so cool to me. Sometimes i feel lost, i feel that He's not there, that I'm talking to air, but no, I know I'm not. Oh, thoguh A levels cannot be removed from my life at this point of time, I have a Hope that I can turn to. Amen.
Ah, i need to think through and sort my thoughts. Being 18 is no joke. It's like a completely new phase of life after A's. Adulthood no? Life is so short. The friends i meet, i don't wanna lose them like that. I've lost so many in my pri and sec sch days.. it's not like we share a very deep brother brother you-die-i-die kinda relationship, but it's just their presence and just each of them that makes it different. oh, see, everyone IS special. (Aaawww....)
I really seriously don't have a proper flow of thought. it's all messed up and all, no order, no main topic or whatever... Oh my Cheryl A levels is just one month away!
I feel so different for this A levels. I feel disgustingly sickly not very nervous about it. What's wrong? Ah, buck up man.
Is it because I don't have a real aim and goal for this A's that's causing me to be like a leaf in the wind? Lol. It scares me how others seem so strong willed and determined to fight on...unlike me.
Ha , I realised how I was such an insecure kid in the past. I always question whether I have grown during this period of my youth (It's gonna end like reall sooon), yeah, and how others think of me.... Problems problems problems... this goes back to my first point of my post. Problems. We don't bear them alone cause 6 over billion other people are also struggling, not matter how big or small the matter their going through now.
I find it so intriging sometimes, like the fact that 6 over billion people are living on this planet earth, but i don't see them, only on television, like shows, news...(okay it sounds off my it's true) And how right now even as Im typing this post now someone might be facing a life and death situation now, someone may be attempting to commit suicide, a toddler may be abused right now, an old man struggling on the hospital bed right at this moment...... I know it sounds really bizarre and warped but don't you ever think about it? It feels quite scary but this thought have come across my mind a few times now and then.... Who are watching over these people?? The whole world every individual one of us??
Look above.
How great You are.
SO guys, when you feel all burdened, tired, weary, pissed off, angry with yourself, irritated by your naggy unreasonable parents, struggling with your inner self, lost in your own world, heart-brokened........ Take a breather. Look out at the creation around you. And yeah, you'll feel at peace and secured.
ooohhhh.... so i have typed quite a post today. Wellos, I need to go off to sleep now, sleot really late last night. So till here. I had an amazing rollercoaster ride this week, how about you?
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
{ 9:51 PM on '' }
hello.
SO let's see what happened this week. Who cares if the prelims are over or not? Time flies and having pure fun is hard. I totally truly sincerely blahblah... had a rough week.
ROUGH.
I feel so.......
Nothing can describe it. Grades, A levels, university, future. I've no idea where I'm heading, I've no idea what i'm doing. I've no idea what next. It's like reality is giving me a tough time. It's having a jolly good time giving me headaches and heartaches, slapping me right smack on the face a thousand times, beating the life out of my soul........Emotions so deep, raw, all starting to surface, and life's not good, at all.
I wanna get it over and done with, though there's really small little things in life that makes me smile and feel a lil good of myself, nothing can compare to the brutality if what reality can bring. Im writing as if I know what I am writing but i think it doesn't even sound sensible.
I think I'm living a nightmare now.
I don't know why the feeling of unfairness keeps dawning upon me... It's so hard to really look myself in the eye and see all that's happening, to see how am I really doing, how am i salvaging what barely is left. Escaping is such an easy way out, like DUH, and i've a tendency to go blank and let the world go round. Sometimes, i think im not Cheryl. Like im somebody else in a horror film. (No idea what this means it just popped out of my mind)
I want to ramble all day long. That's how i release my emotions i guess.. ah, why bother socialising when im already at the end of the cliff? Why still invest on everything else except studying 24/7? Some pple say their screwed, but they aren't. They so aren't. I can't help but ramble. What's wrong with me?
This is harder than I thought. I know this is all serious and like major. My i' think i'll just probably suffocate in all this mess... ah, time flies. All that has happened, marks significance in this time of my life.
Identity crisis.
I NEEEEEDD TO SPRINT NOW.
No, i need to be lifted up, out of all this .
Move.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
{ 2:37 PM on '' }
YO YO YO i'm not in the midst of prelims.
Ya know sometimes I wonder waht have I been doing all my past years.. seriously.. I made some super careless mistakes today aaahhh terrible.. It's weird how Im so not myself during papers, as in i feel different(because im subcousciously stressed and im not sure of my stuff),,, I don't wanna be looked down upon, or be seen as a failure.. Well, this is life and one of my challenges and boy don't know how to feel. Oh well.
But i know I've got hope. And Yeah, God's always there.
GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO LESS THAT TWO MONTHS MORE GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
{ 12:38 AM on '' }
Hello people!
Yeah this weekend has been great! Totally cause studying wasn't involved i guess. Don't follow me but yeah, UBEROCK went along pretty well, and I'm so glad my classmates came! Wahahaha.... it was quite funny, the whole thing haha.. And i was glad that everyone hung out quite well together.. Hmmmm, hopefully to see more coming down ya!!!!! More times at starbucks ya!
I thought it was rather dark and gloomy in the service hall haha but anyway it was a great day.
UBEROCK
The people with happy three friends behind
thank you guys for coming! (:
Haha great Saturday!
And for Sunday, i was at The Human Race supporting my friends. Yippee everyone was great! The fastest guy was like 32 min, like crazy. Oh well overall it was quite fun hanging out and all. And please do NOT walk from city to that parkway fish and co cause it's really HOT. Haha. And I was complaining all da way haha.
Oh well, great weekend, will it be great studying this week too? I really hope so.
I have nth to blog about cause i feel quite tired and bored. Y;know it's so funny how eeryone blogs about the same thing haha and we have to read it over again but with different writing styles and all. Well well, oh but i feel this weekend was great, really.
Haha, and i've been sleeping really late these days, kinda -.-
Oh well, gotta wake up early tmr and complete my work! Oh my. Hahaaaaaa, see ya after prelims!
Great.
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Cheryl
Female.
19.
Loves freedom but doesn't treasure it
Basically still a kid crying for momma
Loves
To be accepted
To belong
To be embraced
Yay.
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